The High Status Male

Hi Mike,

When talking to a girl for the first time just after having approached her, I want to find out if she is:

1 ADVENTUROUS
2 SPONTANEOUS
3 STRONG (MENTALLY)
4 UP FOR A CHALLENGE
5 HAS GOOD WIT
6 SOPHISTICATED
7 AN OPTIMIST
8 NOT AFRAID TO TAKE CHANCES

Those are my primary personality wishes/requirements that I look for in a girl.  I don’t want to waste my time on girls who cannot fulfill those requirements, hence I want to sort out who’s who within minutes of first approach.  The main problem is, that you cannot judge people by what they are saying, but only by what they are doing – and that is a problem when talking to people.

As an example: I would like to be able to throw some tests at a chick while talking to her. As we all know, girls are testing boys all the time.  Girls are probably not used to being tested, but I want to change all that.  So I would like to have some smart phrases ready to test whether a girl is go or no go.

Jerry

Hi Jerry,

Wow… what you’re asking for is really the holy grail of human communication: how to divine someone’s true feelings and character by cutting through the bullshit and revealing their persona instantly using words alone.  If we could figure out this trick, the ability would have far more use in finance and politics than it would simply picking up women!

To do the things you want you absolutely do need to see people in action – because that’s where they reveal themselves. And in courting, that’s what dating is for.

Yeah I know, it’s not fast enough if you’re impatient, but life doesn’t work like a video game.  It takes risks, effort, discipline to see a job through to the end, and unfortunately… some time invested.  There is a way to accelerate this process somewhat though — skip the dull dinner-and-movie date.  I always recommend an ACTION date as the first date because it’s better than sitting around yapping (which is also a good way to get yourself in trouble by over-revealing too much mundane junk about yourself that places you in a bad light. It busts your mystery factor…).

In your case this is ideal because If you’ve got an interesting girl on the hook, then robust “action” dating is the way to smoke out those important qualities that you listed.  For instance, when you take her out on the first date, pull a switch.  Tell her you’re going to be doing one thing, then when you’ve got her in the car, say you’ve changed plans and are going to take her someplace entirely different.  This will test her for spontaneity, right? Does she take up the spirit of adventure with you, or go into a pout?   There’s your answer to questions 1, 2, 4 & 7 from your list.  Take her someplace like snowboarding or hiking, a good test for adventure.   Does she love it or complain because she’d rather be sitting on her ass at a movie?

You’ll never really find any of this out about anyone for sure unless you put them to these sorts of reality tests for those characteristics that are important to you.  Tests performed by DOING, not talking.  Dating is this time-honored testing process for you.  You have to use your head when you’re doing this stuff, woman are an intellectual challenge.

As you point out, people can lie and tell you anything they think you may want to hear — and they can do this no matter how cleverly you think you can sneak the truth out of them by using tricky phases.  Women test men by tricking them into displays of honesty / dishonesty, or courage / cowardice.  This is different than the tests you are thinking about doing, which are tests of temperament and demeanor and require action to expose.