The High Status Male

I just listened to the Tiger Woods public apology / news conference this morning and something that he said near the very beginning of his speech, before he got into all the standard politically-correct BS about how he’s going to work to turn his life around and blah-blah-blah, sort of struck me.  I scribbled it down from memory as he was speaking so the following is probably not an exact quote, but this is the essence of what he said:

“I worked hard all my life for my success, and I felt that I deserved to enjoy myself.  I felt I was entitled.”

Of course, he was talking about being entitled to his hold his stable of “sms” mistresses in addition to his hot Scandinavian wife.

You hate to see the poor guy being raked over the coals like this, but what’s really sad about this whole story may not be entirely obvious to everyone, so let me just state it very plainly: the fact that society has made it so that when a woman achieves great success at the fulfillment of her primary female biological imperative (i.e., to husband a man and bear lots of healthy children, be a mom, etc.) she is praised and generally lauded and thought most highly of.

But when a man achieves great success in the pursuit of HIS biological imperative (i.e., to sire as many children as possible from as many different women as possible in order to give them all collectively the best odds of being born healthy enough to survive) he is scorned as a scumbag and dragged before microphones to confess and seek repentance for his sins.

Exactly what sins are we talking about here?  The sin of being male.

You see, in society’s convoluted view of things, a man should strive for greatness and achievement and status and power… BUT when he gets there he should behave as though he’s just an ordinary guy and NOT exercise his imperative to claim his ultimate prize.  What is this ultimate prize?  The harem.  Now many of you may recoil at this notion, but this doesn’t change the fact that men are primarily driven to achieve ONLY for very reason that it makes many different types of women attracted to them… and (if we’re REALLY high status) a large number of them as well!

All the other toys and the cool lifestyle is an extra added bonus, but it’s not the primary reason that we kill ourselves and crawl over one another to achieve anything really worthwhile in our lives.  We do it because it’s the harem that we seek — the situation of being the center of multiple and endless female attention!

I believe that Tiger Woods was lamenting the fact that, despite all his years of sacrifice and hard work (and yes, natural talent), he was now being punished from all directions simply because he had tried to claim the prize that all High Status Males are (yes!) ENTITLED to possess.

Historically, the sultan, the king and the chieftain have always maintained a harem.  It was seen as the birthright of the powerful, alpha male.  Reproduce away, alpha!  We need more great warriors like you! The problem is, it used to be that only the most physically powerful men or the true bad asses of the world could make claim to this prize (although later it could be inherited through royal family lines as well).  But nowadays there are many roads to the top of the mountain and anyone with the talent or savvy to become rich or famous by whatever means possible (talent, hard work, savvy or dumb luck) can access a high status life.  And this pisses a lot of people off — so society has created Rules of Conduct that make the possibility of the HSM claiming his harem a sordid and classless act to be universally scorned and spit upon.  Cheater!  Betrayer!  How selfish you are!

But the fact that our primary biological imperative has been used as a doormat for society to wipe its feet upon for so long doesn’t change the fact that this drive has in fact created much of the world as we know it.

Let’s face it, the need for men to impress women for the purpose of eliciting sexual favors is the central and primary driving dynamo behind just about everything that happens in the world… all of it, ever.  All the skyscrapers that rise to the heavens (no symbolic phallic intentions there I suppose , the electricity that gets pumped into our modern lives, the zillion-and-one products that get manufactured all over the world by legions of brilliant and industrious men… all of it occurs mostly as a side-effect of these men collectively working on all these various different projects for but a single purpose: to gain access to women.

No, it only LOOKS like they’re doing it to support their families and make a good living (that’s the high-minded cover story, actually), the real reason is to achieve the widespread approval and ultimate sexual favor of women.

And LOTS of them if at all possible!

That’s right: whatever great or small boost in their own personal status that these activities can grant to men, it’s all done ultimately to get laid.  To gain the attention of females and say: “look at this accomplishment!  Look at my male display of wealth and authority!  Are you getting turned on yet?”  And oh yes, they are! It’s their positive reaction to the accomplishments of men that in fact greases the very wheels of civilization.  Because without it, our drive to create, exceed and excel all pretty much vanishes.

Let’s do an Einstein-like thought experiment for a moment and imagine a world where humans are all composed only of males, males who have NO sex drive, incidentally.  Sex and the constellation of emotions that it normally produces simply doesn’t exist in this fantasy world.  Our plumbing is just a plain old urine disposal tube.  (How do we reproduce?  I don’t know… we bud off a son every ten years from our right elbows like amoebas, it’s just a thought experiment!)

So as an inhabitant of this man-planet, why am I striving to upgrade my house, or get some flashy jewelry or buy a fancy new set of wheels for myself?  Or to even have a nice house at all for that matter?  To impress ol’ fatso Larry down the block?  Who cares about him?  (and BTW, when’s Larry plan on bringing back the lawn mower that he borrowed last week?  Actually, now that I think of it, to hell with the lawn… let it grow into a jungle!  Without a wife to bitch about it what do I care anyway?  There goes the lawnmower industry.)

Yes, men would everywhere be living at a much slower, simpler, bearcave-like existence if they only needed their basic food and barracks to get by.  It’s in pursuit of trying to impress all those sexy women that men have created all these other things that so complicate our lives and make it a wonder worth living!

Oh sure, our fantasy man-world society might have developed some other way to motivate the stinky slugs over eons of cultural development — but this motivation would have had to been imposed on them or brainwashed into them somehow rather than naturally embraced I would think.  What a world that would be… boring and miserable I would imagine.

It is Pussy Power that ultimately drives us to achieve excellence!

So I have some free advice for all you high status males out there: don’t get married.  Ever.  To do so is to FORGET the reason that you sought such great status in the first place: to gain access to your harem — not to the toys that wealth and power can also buy for you.  As they say, a man is only as faithful as his options — and the HSM has many.  That’s why we seek it, nay, KILL OURSELVES TO ATTAIN IT!

Marriage is for the lesser among us who don’t have the resources and therefore the option of supporting the harem — or else we would be ALL be deep into the harem lifestyle!

But that would only diminish the harem to being nothing special or out of the ordinary, and therefore why chase after success to attain it?  There has to be some special reward for high status.  Yeah I know, you guys want it ALL just like Tiger Woods did… the respectability of a wife and family too, yada-yada.  But then again… WHY is it so respectable to be a married guy and father anyway?  Why isn’t being a HSM sultan respectable as well?…

It’s a female plot to keep THEIR biological imperative the preeminent one in the popular culture!  WOMEN are the ones who in fact are currently having it both ways: they get all of us men striving and competing against one another for higher status (which makes us attractive to them), but once they pluck off the HSM’s they get to keep them for themselves and exclusively hook into their wealth and power.  Because these men are then pressured by society to remain faithful and “respectable” which effectively short-circuits their ability to create the harem they so desire to possess.

And when one of them does so anyway… look out!  On your knees and grovel for your repentance, scumbag!

One of the most honest and up-front guys in the world is Hugh Hefner if you ask me, the founder of Playboy.  Sure he’s old and decrepit now and his young girlfriends make him look like a childish fool in some ways, but here’s a guy who for the past 60 years has been trying to show HSM’s how to shamelessly embrace their entitlement to the harem! Yes, this was the lesson that Hef was always promoting via the Playboy philosophy: he tried to change things and reverse the male curse of being scorned for having crossed the finish line FIRST… but society has not embraced it.  Female push-back has been too great.  Her haughty prerogative to reproduce by husbanding the best available male (on a now OVER-populated planet BTW) is still much celebrated — while the lothario remains the lowlife to be snubbed and made to seek public forgiveness via humiliation and supplication.  It’s all still very biblical and left over from a much different point in the development of human society.

Anyway, for all you guys who wish to seek higher and higher status, please understand that it will place you in a position where you MUST live a life that’s different from the ordinary guy. The life of the sultan.  By trying to be married and committed to a single wife, to put up with her aging and crumbling personality just like any ordinary Joe blow MUST, you are cheating yourself of the very reason that you were driven to seek high status in the first place. This denial will eat away at your soul once you realize that you are in fact squandering your status just as surely as if you were scattering your personal wealth to the wind.  Be honest with yourself: you didn’t work for all that money.  You worked for the pussy! And now you’re supposed to deny the reward and hook up exclusively with just ONE female?

Therein lies the internal dichotomy that wages war within the mind of the HSM… fertile soil for regrets that gnaw away at his happiness, and his ultimately fidelity too.

Tiger Woods, you were only living out your HSM imperative — but alas you were “caught” doing something that in fact you should have been shamelessly proud of doing! Just like Hugh Hefner.  Now society demands its’ pound of flesh — and since your income is tied to public acceptance, you feel you must prostrate yourself to get back into its good graces in order to maintain your status.

Now THAT’S sad.

And to all you future HSM’s who get “caught” being a Man: stop apologizing.  Women wanted equal rights in society and in the workplace and they eventually got it.  Now it’s time for all of us Men to stand up and face down this twisted, baseless cultural reflex to heap collective scorn upon those of us who dare to live our lives as we were programmed to do.

Programming, by the way, which conveniently delivered us all here today to piss and moan about it.  Biology is as biology does baby.