- Article by Derek Lamont. For more information, check out this free video presentation by him on how to pick up girls online.
#1: Use body language and posture to your advantage.
Body language and posture is typically a completely subconscious phenomenon. You don’t think about how you’re sitting in a chair or how your shoulders are moving when you walk through the grocery store. But while you may not be thinking about these things, other people are also subconsciously evaluating your body language and forming opinions about you before you even say ‘hello’.
Body posture is more than just sitting up straight. It means standing tall, with your stomach in (but not in an unnatural way, of course) and your chest out (again, don’t over-exaggerate this). Try not to slump down when you’re sitting in a chair, and keep any excess flab from naturally flowing out over your belt line.
Your shoulders should be back slightly, and your head should be straight up and not looking down to the floor. Many people have a subconscious slump that makes them look shorter than they actually are, and can convey a sense of awkwardness (think Quasimodo). This is a big no-no because it sends strong messages of timidness and self-doubt.
Alpha males (and yes, you do want to appear as though you’re a bonafide alpha male!) walk with their heads held high, their shoulders back, and they’re not afraid to make eye contact. They speak clearly and enunciate their words, making sure their words come across with a sense of authority.
Don’t go overboard with the body posture and alpha male speaking habits... this can actually end up making you look like a total meathead. But if you just make subtle changes to the way you walk, talk, and position your body, you can make a huge difference to the way people perceive you.
#2: Convey confidence through your clothing and fashion choices.
People who are self-confident don’t need to seek approval from others. They’re not afraid to buck the trend or do something different. Self-confidence often translates to being a leader in some way or another.
An easy way to subtly show off your total disregard for the opinions of others (again, an alpha male characteristic that demonstrates confidence) is to choose a clothing style that is edgy or different.
Let’s get one thing straight: you don’t want to wear a yellow jumpsuit and a cowboy hat to your job interview. This isn’t about looking ridiculous or putting on a show for the world to see... it’s about choosing clothes that others might not buy because they’re worried they “can’t pull it off” or that others will question their sense of fashion.
You’ll need to be careful with this one, because choosing the wrong clothes can look downright awful. The trick is to find clothes that are both socially acceptable but also stylish and unique. You may already know someone with a strong sense of style that uses this technique effectively to convey a sense of leadership and self-confidence.
Next time you walk into a trendy clothing store and think to yourself, “I don’t think I would look good in that,” try it on anyway. Don’t question your ability to dress in a given way or wear certain edgy accessories.... just try on a bunch of things you wouldn’t normally ever consider wearing, and buy a few of them each time you go on a clothes shopping spree.Again, keep in mind that these two strategies I just described aren’t going to make a huge difference to your overall image... but they can drastically change the way others subconsciously evaluate you based on the way you look and act. And, if applied properly, these two techniques can help you convey a much stronger sense of confidence and self-esteem -- both of which happen to be qualities that women find extremely appealing.